Ramadan as a Married Woman

Assalam alaykum

This is my third year celebrating Ramadan, alhumdulilah, and because it is my first year living with my husband it warrants a post. :) The differences between this year and the last two years are too many to list so I'll just hi light the ones that are biggest imho:

Group Effort: Before living with my husband it was me and me alone on this journey of fasting and I felt so very isolated. Now I have not only someone to commiserate with when we both have migraines from lack of food but someone to help me get out of bed in the morning! Our pattern has been to wake at 4am, he will cook suhoor (normally eggs and some cheese and tomatoes with pita bread and tea), we eat, we pray, we go back to bed. Iftar is my duty while the tea after is his. We're a well oiled machine I tell ya!

Womanly Hiatus: This has always been viewed as a blessing to me in the past but this year it saddens me that I am not fasting on some of the days while he is. It feels like that deep, strong connection and bonding is lost while I await the day where I can once again join my husband. I know that it is from Allah so I abide by the rules but it's just not the same, you know? :(

Culture Shock: Hehehe. I remember when we were still waiting for my husband's visa I would complain about how hard it is to fast to him and he would sternly tell me how it is our obligation, blah blah blah. Well sure, easy for him to say since he was living in Cairo and sleeping basically from Fajr till Maghrib!!! Now that he is working full time I am able to see how this obligation is viewed in quite a different light! :P That's all I'll say about that!

I'm doing my best to abstain from the worldly part of the Internet though I must say the presidential election has my interest peaked big time these days so I do still read the news. I just try to stay away from the controversial blogs that attack this that or the other thing, which lately is hard to do given all the ammo that's been put out there!

All in all I think a lot of lessons are being learned this year for how to make next year more fulfilling. In the end it will never be the same as it was when I was alone and for that I am truly blessed. :)

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"I have only created Jinns and men, that they may serve Me."

Assalam alaykum,

I hope that everyone is gaining spiritually from this blessed month of Ramadan. Most people set goals in the beginning that they wish to achieve by the end of this month. For me personally, whenever a goal is set I do my best not to reach it. I tend to avoid any and all additional responsibility to my life like the plague. Seriously, I was psyched when my 11 yr old announced that she won't be playing field hockey this season because that's one less thing for me to do!

I digress......I think I've hit a milestone in my search for the meaning of this life here on Earth. When I look at the verse 51:56 in the Quran it tells me what my meaning here is:

"I have only created Jinns and men, that they may serve Me."

Below is a quick and dirty analysis of the above verse and is only by me and me alone so if I make a mistake I ask for forgiveness. I am not a scholar...far from it!!! Just my synopsis of what this means to me.

I= Allah so there's no room for questioning this one.
ONLY=no OTHER purpose whatsoever do I have but to serve Allah. That's it. I'm not here to make money, live in a nice home, drive a good car, eat the best of foods. Nope. I'm here for ONLY one purpose and that is to serve Allah.
created= It's not like Allah just found us and said, " from now on you will only serve me!". Nope. He CREATED us for the sole purpose of serving Him. We were made for this.
This brings a whole new perspective on what I'm doing each and every day. I know that I am supposed to say bismillah before I eat and pretty much before I do anything at all since each and every action I make on this Earth can be made into a prayer to Allah. What I never understood is why. Why should I make everything a prayer? Well guess what...it's why I'm here silly!!!!!!

I have read that verse about 10 times since I converted three years ago but just last night did the sun rise over this marble head!!! I guess it started when my husband and I were walking while eating ice cream after iftar on Revere Beach Saturday night. He made a comment that suprised me (because it was deep and he's not usually like that) and made me think. He said he is shocked at how Americans here hold on so very tightly to this life and compared us to people he knows in Egypt who view life here as a trip...a very temporary trip. I made a joke that life certainly can be pretty trippy at times but that's not what he meant. :P

I hope that I can from now on make my life a big worship-fest for Allah! When I got into my car to drive to work this morning I did it in the name of Allah. When I began to run my reports I did it in the name of Allah. I did not miss the opportunity to pray duhr here today because that is one of the biggest gifts I think that I have been given......a true way to worship Allah.

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